Slowmotion Apocalypse "My Own Private Armageddon" CD
[Tribunal]
Will a time ever come when the melodic Swedish death metal style will finally start to die back?  When labels will ease up on not only scouring their own lands for bands to sign, but also searching overseas for bands that, regardless of talent, have absolutely nothing new to offer whatsoever?  That remains to be seen, but I have to say, I have very little interest in anything that I hear these days once I hear that first generic dual guitar harmony or tremolo picking melody, unless it's really amazing.  Is this band good?  Sure.  Are they better songwriters and musicians than most of the second- or third-rate bands of this style floating around these days?  Yeah.  But nonetheless, this Italian outfit sounds exactly like every other act out there that's taking this particular road.  Hoarse vocal screams?  Check.  Thrashy riffing that has a little bit of a European metalcore tinge to it?  Check.  Plenty of dual guitar harmonies and peppy alternate picking?  Check.  They do add in some synths and stuff as backing texture on rare occasion, which is totally unnecessary but doesn't really hinder them at all, but other than that it's 100% standard.  The riffs are solid (as are the solos) and the songs stick within three- to five-minute timeframes that tend to be of the streamlined and effective variety that I prefer, but again... it's the same old song and dance, you know?  I mean, everyone reading this review already knows basically exactly what this sounds like by now.  "The Beginning of the Apocalypse" is the boring instrumental intro that uses more keyboards than the entire rest of the record combined, "Psychic War 2.0" is a little heavier and has some thicker dissonant chords going on that I like, "My Future is Burning" takes a similar but chunkier road with some staccato riffing, and barring a few minor subtleties there are a bunch of other songs that sound incredibly similar to one another throughout.  The recording is alright, too.  It's crisp and sounds pretty good but needs a little tweaking.  The drums are a hint overly taut, but that only matters since the bass isn't playing much of a role and the guitars need a fuller presence.  The guitar tone is well controlled and crunchy, but there's a sense of flatness to the mix where I feel like it needs more punch.  More brightness, a little more density, etc.  It definitely sounds good enough to get ‘em by, but with a generic band like this a truly impressive recording can help pull ‘em up to another rung above the morass of their contemporaries, so...  The layout looks pretty good, but I have to state that the images of a nude female with angel wings who is spattered with blood are super cheesy as well as 100% tired and overdone.  The lyrics are also 50/50 between lines that don't strike me and lines that seem a little overdramatic and forced.  "There is a claw grabbing my skull to remind me how my life was meant to be, I pursued a dream for years, I thought it could be useful now it seems it has to fade away..."  Ehhh, they just don't do much for me.  I hate to be so hard on these guys since they are better than average, but that's the thing, it's gotten to the point where even the better than average bands in this genre aren't worth taking note of.  So if labels don't start being more selective and pushing for bands that have more creativity to offer, this fucking cycle is never going to end.  There are already thousands of bands that sound exactly like Slowmotion Apocalypse out there, so even if Slowmotion Apocalypse is better than, say, 75% of ‘em... what do they have that should make Joe Schmo spend $10 on their CD instead of just pulling out his At the Gates CD's, or even Darkest Hour, and listening to those instead, you know? (6/10)
Running time - 39:54, Tracks: 10
[Notable tracks: Psychic War 2.0, My Future is Burning]
Tribunal Records - http://www.tribunalrecords.net

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